Changes

Life is unexpected. Everything can change in an instant, or stay the same for several years. You always have to be prepared for change, though. Otherwise, it can blindside you, flipping your life upside down and all around.

Six months ago, my life was different. I was in a committed relationship, I was working 20 hours a week, and I was in college. Now, I’m single, working 40 hours a week, and have dropped out of college. I hadn’t planned on any of these changes, but they happened, and I wasn’t really prepared for it.

In high school, I had grand ideas for what my future would be like. I thought I would be married by twenty years old, selling millions of books, and living my own life. Reality slapped me in the face two months ago, and forced me to really look at my life. I realized my life was not going according to plan, that I wasn’t happy, and that everything needed to change.

I won’t go into details about my recent breakup, but it was hard. It’s still hard, adjusting to being on my own. Not having that other person there to talk to, or to spend time with, is really difficult. But I am happier, because I have more time for myself. I’ve been more focused, and have rekindled my love for reading and writing. I was able to start this blog, and I’ve started brainstorming about ideas for novels and trilogies. My passion is back.

Working became a passion for me as well, right after I got that first paycheck. It was nice to have money and have the ability to pay my own bills. I still live with my parents, but I pay for my own stuff. I hardly rely on my parents for much, aside from their love, support, and that they let me live with them.

I dropped out of college last week. I was an English major, and I hated my English classes. Not because I wasn’t learning, but because I was learning things that didn’t pertain to what I want to do. Poetry and the classics are great, but they aren’t something I need to know to be an author. I wanted to develop better sentence structure and grammar, which I’m already pretty good at. I did not, however, want to compare a painting to a piece of literature, or write a research paper about why a sentence is written the way it is.

College is not for me. If I want to learn business mechanics, I’ll go work and get experience to do so. I can’t sit in a classroom and learn, I have to learn through doing. It’s just how I am. I’m not saying, “Don’t go to college”, because there are some careers that need college-level learning. But if you want be someone that isn’t a doctor or lawyer, JUST DO IT! (Shia Labeouf reference)

Because I have more time on my hands, I decided I wanted to work more. I’ve gone from working 20 hours a week to 40 hours a week, which is really great. The money will really help, and I’m hoping to save up enough to move out. I’ll probably have to get a roommate, since it is so expensive to live in California, but I’ll manage. I love my job, I love my coworkers, and I love the customers. Do I want to work there for the rest of my life? Of course not. I want to make enough money as an author that I won’t need a job, but that isn’t my reality right now. But, I am happy right now, and that is what matters.

I guess what I’m trying to say is, think about your life. Really think about it. If you aren’t happy with the way your life is going, change it! You are the main character in your story, and you are also the author. Only you can control what you do, and only you can control your own happiness. If you aren’t happy, close this chapter. Turn the page and begin the next one.